JolieSimons.com

I very rarely have the knee jerk reaction to boycott anything. I’m a friend to the large corporation. I use plenty of products from so-called “evil” organizations, including the Microsoft-powered laptop on which I currently type. Now why in the world would I send a letter to Kellogg’s informing them I couldn’t purchase their products anymore?

As might already know, the story goes like this: Swimmer Michael Phelps won eight gold medals at the Beijing Olympics, more than anyone else in history.  After the games, Phelps signed a bunch of very lucrative contracts to hawk products for the likes of Kellogg’s, Omega watches, and more. A few days ago, a British tabloid printed a picture taken by some jerk at a college party of Michael Phelps smoking marijuana. A few days after that, Kellogg’s informed the public that they would no longer honor Phelps’s endorsement contract.

Why did this action by Kellogg’s get me so upset? Well…

• Phelps, for all intents and purposes, had his privacy violated at that party, even if there’s no inherent right to privacy at a public event.

• Phelps, like most Americans, probably has the opinion that marijuana isn’t all that big a deal. The worst harm that the drug can cause a person is if they get caught by authorities. The punishment for marijuana in this country far out weights any of the dangers of the drug itself.  What do people in countries with more sane marijuana policy feel about the Kellogg’s decisions? Are they insulted?

• Several states in this nation have legalized medical use of marijuana. Whether you agree or not, this reflects the shifting position of Americans that marijuana isn’t that big a deal to anyone but the authorities.

• Kellogg’s is insulting all Americans who believe that this country is founded on principles of privacy and personal liberty, even if our federal laws don’t always reflect those values. 

I’m sad to see Kellogg’s leave my life. Kellogg’s makes several products I really enjoy, including Morningtar Farms meatless products and All-Bran cereal, both of which I’ve eaten to help me with my recent 50 pound weight loss.

I urge Kellogg’s to reconsider their position and apologize to Phelps for their much ado about nothing. Reinstating Phelps as a spokesperson would also be nice.

I’d also like to pose the following question: What year does Kellogg’s believe it is, anyway?

Britons, if you are reading this, perhaps you could explain some things to me.

For Yanks, here’s the story. BBC Radio Two is apparently the most popular radio station in England. On Radio Two, listeners could tune in to a late night radio show hosted by none other than Russell Brand. Americans know Brand from the film Forgetting Sarah Marshall and American teens know him as the most recent host of MTV’s Video Music Awards.

Brits, however, have had quite enough of Brand’s antics, apparently. On Brand’s October 18th episode of his TV show, he and popular BBC presenter Jonathon Ross were having a bit of fun. Americans won’t recognize Jonathon Ross at all, so no point in trying to explain. Suffice it to say that Ross is one of the highest paid men on the BBC payroll for his work on both radio and TV.

Both men thought it would be a good idea to make cheeky phone calls to Andrew Sachs’s answering machine. Sachs is best known for his acting role on Fawlty Towers as the Spanish waiter. For those Americans who didn’t watch as much PBS as I did growing up, you probably don’t know who Sachs is, either.

Point is, Brand and Ross decided to joke that Brand had slept with Sachs’s granddaughter and told him just that. So, in a series of possibly-misguided comedy bits, the two men left several messages for Sachs claiming so, making it worse, and milking the moment for comedy.

Apparently that sort of thing doesn’t go over well with Brits.

Because of a joke phone call, Ross has been suspended for about three months without pay. That means he can’t do his radio show, and he can’t present–or “host” as we say in the States–on his or any other BBC television show. BBC News reports claim that this gaff could cost Ross about 1 million pounds.

Brand has quit his show as well. Damn, I was really starting to enjoy his podcasts.

Now the station director at Radio Two, Lesley Douglas, has quit her job over the incident.

So Britons, I want to know: what’s so wrong with that?

I realize it’s not technically polite to call an aging actor and make obscene claims on his answering machine. However, have you ever heard the raunchy talk on American morning radio shows?

Perhaps one of you could explain what in the world was so wrong with a crude joke? I mean, they may be rude, but Ross and Brand are certainly no Opie and Anthony.

UPDATE: Seems like we get away with much more on our airwaves here in America. Plus, we don’t have that English propensity for perpetual politeness. I guess our ability to spread out and have more personal space is a contributor to that, making us, in the minds of the space-cramped Europeans, rude, loud, and obnoxious. And so the cultural divide continues.

Quinton “Rampage” Jackson is one of my favorite UFC fighters. He’s the guy who wears a huge, industrial-looking chain around his neck. He’s the one who beat up Chuck Liddell for the title win in UFC 71. He’s the guy who, up until his stupid loss to Forrest Griffin, was the UFC Light Heavyweight champ. He’s got one of the funniest mouths in MMA.

Well, turns out Quinton is a bad man indeed.

Yesterday, while driving around in a monster truck emblazoned with a Toyo Tires logo and his own picture, Quinton led Newport Beach police on a chase after a hit and run accident. Police arrested Rampage at gunpoint, as these shocking pictures from TMZ can attest. Apparently Jackson was driving erratically, swerving lanes and driving on the sidewalk.

Jackson was then taken to the hospital. Some say Rampage was visibly not well, and cops forced the champ to go to the hospital before taking further action.

Well, Jackson was picked up again today, supposedly for his erratic behavior. He is currently in the hospital. Now word yet on his condition or the cause of his erratic behavior. TMZ reports that friends have claimed that he’s not been well lately.

As a fan, I would never condone Jackson’s actions, but I do hope he gets well soon and seeks treatment for his problems.

Also, enjoy some of Rampage Jackson’s famous quotes (definitely R rated). He’s quite the dirty Yogi Berra, that guy.

First, the story was hostile. Belgian brewer InBev set its sites on the St. Louis-based brewing giant Anheuser-Busch and was not going to let go until AB was in its growing portfolio of beer brands. InBev already owns Anheuser-Busch Canada. It wanted AB so bad that they threatened a hostile takeover. First, they were going to pull an FDR and pack the board with InBev-friendly board members. Then they were going to take the case directly to shareholders in hopes that they could gain control of AB for a cut-rate price, but that wasn’t necessary and AB was sold to InBev for $52 billion dollars, making St. Louisans sad. Even Obama is sad about the sale.

Of course, InBev realizes that this is the best time to buy possible. The dollar is weak against the Euro, and AB is a $50 billion dolllar-plus bargain.

InBev claims that things in St. Louis won’t change much. Anheuser-Busch headquarters will still be housed in St. Louis, they say, and they will continue substantial charitable donations. Of course, millions of dollars float around St. Louis not-for-profits today, and there is no certainty that these charities will receive any money once the takeover is complete. My friend who works at a local art museum can’t count on having job next year if InBev does indeed pull their funding of local arts and charitable organizations.

AB has already had plans in place to cut costs. They’ve recently renegotiated benefits for employees to cut costs. They are no longer filling open positions and more people could be losing their jobs in the future.

So is this another nail in the coffin of the St. Louis economy? The automotive business has moved out, slowly but surely, as the local Chrysler plants have announced that they will be cutting thousands of good blue collar jobs. Now the monument of St. Louis corporations, Anheuser-Busch is no longer a St. Louis company and there’s no guarantees that AB will stay in this city, state, or even country.

I’m reminded of the eighties documentary Roger & Me, directed by Michael Moore. While St. Louis is no Flint, Michigan, we are certainly facing an uncertain economic future. On the plus side, with the weakening dollar, we become more attractive to foreign business. We have a large, qualified work force, ready and willing to take on the challanges of running a successful corporation or assembling complicated, high-tech products.

So is the InBev takeover really a nail in the coffin of the St. Louis economy? Well, that remains to be seen.

I spotted the following picture about Barack Obama and I’m frankly quite sick.

Turns out some Republican-themed vendor is selling the above buttons at the state Republican convention in Texas. No matter how often John McCain denounces ignorance and hate within the more conservative sector of the country, there’s still no appeasing the completely ignorant.

Apparently, many of those ignorant people live in Texas.

As you may recall from earlier this year, a wealthy Colorado businessman was speaking at a trade show when he was taped telling this very “joke” to a large crowd that, like it or not, a few clapped after the joke was told. He caught hell because of that statement and he later apologized.

The same rule must apply in this case. This vendor should be pulled and offered no more contracts with Republicans. Also, we should take a long, hard look at this issue within ourselves. Barack Obama is probably acutely aware that his race will still be a struggle with a certain percentage of America. Frustrating, but ending racism is an uphill battle.

McCain, to his credit, has smartly embraced the idea of avoiding race altogether. After all, in our modern society, we are supposed to be colorblind.

Seems like people are getting really worked up about mixed martial arts. However, let’s take a departure from sport and delve into presidential politics.

Overcoming all the setbacks, Obama has recently been crowned by the media as official Candidate for the Democratic party. Clinton, however, has not yet officially stepped out of the race yet and Clinton’s camp is claiming that she is looking for a way to bow out gracefully. Or maybe that’s a lie and she’ll fight a presumably losing battle all the way to the Democratic Convention in August.

Obama is the most unlikely candidate in U.S. history and his candidacy is truly historic. Obama has overcome great setbacks in his campaign:

• Barack Obama is the first serious black candidate for President from the two major political parties to appear on the November ballot. Previous black candidates like Jesse Jackson never made it out of the primaries.
• Obama has fought back against a decentralized smear campaign, including allegations that he is secretly a Muslim, the Antichrist, and a non-loyal U.S. citizen.
• Obama has laughed in the face of media-heavy scandal, including arguments over the Reverend Jeremiah Wright, Obama’s former pastor. He has since quit his old church in Chicago. Polls have shown that most people don’t care, despite media coverage of the story.
• Obama is also quite possibly the most liberal serious candidate in years, certainly more liberal than President Clinton, Al Gore, or John Kerry. Democrats sigh relief. Finally, no more having to vote for a trumped-up moderate Republican candidate who masquerades as a Democrat.

We now have 22 weeks until the general election in November where Obama will face presumptive candidate John McCain.

If you have not done so, now would be a good time to register to vote or change your address. Remember, many states, including my home state of Missouri, have enacted tough voter ID laws, probably to keep Democratic voters–you know, the poor, minorities–away from the polls. Now is the time to review laws in your state. Most require you to show some sort of proof of residency like a photo ID, recent utility bill, or bank statement when voting.

Regardless of outcome, this election will turn out to be one for the history books.

The New York Times is reporting that an all-Republican Texas appeals court has ruled that the 468 children taken from the Mormon fundamentalist compound in west Texas were taken and held illegally. The children were taken from the Yearning for Zion FLDS polygamist ranch outside of Eldorado, Texas.

The prosecutors for the state could not prove that the children were in any imminent danger of physical or sexual abuse and that the abuse previously reported was mostly unsubstantiated. Though the ruling only applied to the families who appealed, the burden of proof now lies with the state to prove that those remaining children are in immediate danger. Without such proof, all of the children will be returned from the foster families they’ve been living with in as soon as 10 days.

The call that prompted the decision, a call made by a supposed 16-year old girl who was being sexually abused by an older “husband,” is being called a hoax by many. The search for the girl who made the phone call came up empty, leading many to doubt that she actually existed in the first place.

The quick reaction to take away the community’s children was sanctioned by a lower court judge who was chastised in the appeals court’s ruling.

The quick reaction to take away the children, as I’ve said before, stinks of religious condemnation rather than genuine concern for the children. After all, the impetus for the raid was a single phone call and not the long, documented histories required for most children to be placed in the protective custody of a foster family.

Hopefully the state will now find a way to accurately find those children being abused and take them out of their family situations without widespread harm to the entire community.

You can read my previous posts on this subject here and here.

On Thursday, the California Supreme Court made the bold move to overthrow a state law, approved by voters, which prohibited gay people from getting married. This law was similar to laws enacted in states all over the U.S. in the past several years, including an unfortunate ban in my home state of Missouri. In as little as 30 days, Gays should be able to get married legally in California by judges and other authorized figures.

In the 4 to 3 decision, the Republican-appointed Chief Justice Ronald George wrote:

“In contrast to earlier times, our state now recognizes that an individual’s capacity to establish a loving and long-term committed relationship with another person and responsibly to care for and raise children does not depend upon the individual’s sexual orientation.”

The court also cited the state’s former ban on interracial marriage as inspiration for the ruling, saying that they could not reject a ban on interracial marriage while at the same time allowing a ban on gay marriage.

Ellen DeGeneres and Portia de Rossi—the same wonderful Portia from my beloved Arrested Development—have already announced plans to marry legally in California after many years of being together without the possibility of legal marriage. DeGeneres was quoted on Perez Hilton as saying:

“I’m thrilled that the California supreme court overturned the ban on gay marriage. I can’t wait to get married. We all deserve the same rights, and I believe that someday we’ll look back on this and not allowing gays to marry will seem as absurd as not allowing women to vote.

P.S. I’m registered at Crate & Barrel.”

Conservative groups in California are now pushing for a constitutional ban on gay marriage to be put on the November ballot, which would reverse the court’s decision. They are also asking that the court suspend their ruling until a vote can be put to the people in the fall.

Many of these unjust anti-LGBT laws were put on the ballots of several states as a way of swaying voter turnout. In my state of Missouri, the gay marriage ban appeared as a ballot measure right before the key 2004 presidential election. At the time, our Democratic governor managed to muscle back the vote to August leaving the November ballot clear, though the ban still passed. However, in many other states, bans were put on the ballot as a way of bringing out socially conservative voters who would also vote for Bush.

No word yet on how this ruling will affect court rulings in other states.

In a revealing interview with media outlets Politico and Yahoo! News, the Associated Press is revealing that President Bush has given up golf as a way of standing in solidarity with soldiers in Iraq.

In his interview, Bush is quoted as saying, “I don’t want some mom whose son may have recently died to see the commander-in-chief playing golf. I feel I owe it to the families to be as — to be in solidarity as best as I can with them. And I think playing golf during a war just sends the wrong signal.”

So our commander in chief wants us to know that he’s making sacrifices, too? He’s not sending one of his kids to the front line or anything, but it’s a sacrifice nonetheless. No word on whether Bush will also be giving up fishing and horseshoes with Dad, downing cold brews with those crazy kids Jenna and Henry, or giving up reading celebrity gossip blogs in the morning before his daily security briefing.

Life as president must be tough.