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Archive for the ‘Music’ Category

R.I.P. Music Industry

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Lil Wayne\'s \

The first album in three years to have debut-week sales at over a million physical copies–as in CD’s–has reminded us that the music industry is truly dead. Lil Wayne’s Tha Carter III just had some bang-up sales this past week, surpassing the million-copy mark. Sales like that haven’t been seen since 50 Cent’s The Massacre three years ago.

I’ll put this in perspective for those who are white and over the age of thirty or so: Lil Wayne and 50 Cent are rappers and this is a huge indicator of the change in the music industry. The only music that’s selling well is niche music like hip-hop, contemporary country, and the occasional indie rock disk. This explains why the Billboard charts are often littered with the likes of Death Cab for Cutie and Taylor Swift, the teenage contemporary country phenom. That’s not to say that people no longer like more mainstream formats like modern rock or pop, but these artists no longer sell well.

On the other side of the coin, digital purveyors have reported sales that are steadily increasing. CNET reports that Apple’s iTunes service has recently hit the 5 billion sales mark. Ten years ago, music executives were certain that nobody would use a service like iTunes and were adversaries of digital music. These were the same executives that told everyone that nobody would every consider buying digital music. I hope those executives no longer have jobs.

Thing is, the music industry is changing, and often in very bad ways. Niche music is often overrepresented because the assumption is that nobody listens to rock or rock radio anymore. This couldn’t be further from the truth, but unfortunately, rock and pop listeners aren’t buying records. Rock and pop listeners are downloading or burning from others, stacking the industry against them.

Remember the good old days of the mid-nineties, the days of the super-album? Albums like Alanis Morissette’s Jagged Little Pill, Hootie and the Blowfish’s Cracked Rear View, and Dave Matthews Band’s Crash could sell tens of millions of copies, have five radio singles from a single album, and still retain the interest of fans? Those were the days.

In the meantime, I say the music industry has wrought much of this misery on themselves. First, they fail to quickly act in order to embrace the inevitability of digital music. Even today, there are still record labels and artists who remain off of digital music formats for one reason or another. Radiohead only recently allowed services like iTunes to carry their back catalog. So when the music’s not there and the music appeals to a young, tech-savvy crowd, they steal rather than buy. Plus, young music fans know what the record companies are all about. They continue to sue the pants off of kids in college, and sometimes grandmas and children. According to the RIAA, the threat of a lawsuit makes you more enamored of the industry you devote so much time and energy to.

Perhaps the slow death rattle of the record companies is a good thing. With digital music, anyone can distribute their own tunes and promote themselves without a huge record company budget. Ultimately this may be the best thing that’s ever happened to quality music in this country.

Written by joliesimons

June 19, 2008 at 6:58 pm

The 50 Worst Album Covers

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\"All My Friends are Dead\" by Freddie Gage

Just thought I’d pass on a little comic gem I found, a gallery of the 50 worst album covers as compiled by Newsday. Of course these albums are mostly old LP’s, many of which are so tragically awful looking that it boggles the mind.

Also, there seem to be a lot of covers with dummies as in the puppets some comedians use to illicit laughs.

It’s been a hectic week here in the ‘Lou and I don’t know about you, but I could use good laugh. Enjoy!

Written by joliesimons

May 15, 2008 at 10:32 am

Posted in Music, The Interweb

How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love Microsoft

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I’ll admit it: I’m a Vista hater.

I purchased the seminal Microsoft product recently when I bought a new laptop for work. The laptop works okay. I got a good deal on it, certainly, but it comes with a version of the Vista operating system.

Since then, I’ve been battling Vista on what seems like a daily basis. This OS is so huge that it dwarfs the 1 GB of RAM I have. Since then, I’ve battled lockups from opening too many programs at once, and become frustrated at the insanely long time I have to wait just to start up my computer in the morning.

I should also mention that I purchased a Zune, the Microsoft-made MP3 player and Microsoft’s answer to Apple’s wildly successful iPod. Turns out that refurb Zune I bought for such a steal online recently decided to up and die on us.

My husband and I, not expecting much, went ahead and sent the Zune off to Microsoft for repairs. After all, the player was under warranty, but it was a refurb model purchased for cheap. I wasn’t holding out a lot of hope.

Two weeks later, much to our chagrin, Microsoft sent us a lovely FedEx package. It was our new Zune, a replacement for the old one that didn’t work anymore. It was even the same color and was all new: no scratches, no dents, no greasy fingerprints from trying to play the Zune through the car stereo while simultaneously sucking down some Taco Bell on your way to work.

I should also mention that we own an Xbox 360 that has also required repair, and we have never been turned down for our repair requests.

I love a company that stands behind what they sell. Screw hating on Vista all the time. I love Microsoft.

Here’s our new-to-us Zune. Isn’t it a beut?

Zune MP3 Player

Written by joliesimons

April 25, 2008 at 1:00 pm

Posted in Music, Technology

White Gold: Detroit’s Electric Six Sexes Up the Magic of Dairy

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The Best I Can Give is 2%

There’s just something about the band Electric Six, the band from Detroit that has, on numerous occasions, rocked my face right off. I discovered them whilst downloading large amounts of pirated copyrighted material from the Internet using my college’s fat pipes. Among the many discoveries I made that year–Elton John is kind of overrated!–was Electric Six. Since then, my husband, friends and I have followed this band around like lost puppies for years now. We catch nearly every show they have in Missouri, along with many other Midwestern shows. Dick Valentine and the boys had us at “Danger! High Voltage.”

Now, apart from recent albums like I Shall Exterminate Everything Around Me That Restricts Me From Being the Master–yeah, dig the title–, they’ve also written and probably performed some of the music for a hip, new viral web campaign.

And who knew the ads would be for milk? Perhaps the milk people didn’t know that Electric Six once released a song encouraging nuclear war on the dance floor or proclaiming that they “buy the drugs.” But I digress.

The new concept is White Gold, an off-kilter funk-metal band fronted by some dweeb in a bad wig and two sassy ladies on bass and drums. They’ve released two videos on YouTube and an album on iTunes called All I Can Give is 2%. They were also featured in a short Newsweek blurb about how some middle aged white dudes are trying to make milk hip through viral Internet marketing.

So me, sucker for this band and sometimes-band-guestlist member, decided to check out White Gold. The verdict? I know it’s a corporate jingle, in essence, but it rocks. It’s got that cheeky Electric Six vibe going on. The vocals are clearly being performed by E6 lead singer Dick Valentine. As for the instrumentation, White Gold is missing the vital keyboards and rich instrumentation that comes with having six band members. No word yet on whether the rest of the band is performing on All I Can Give is 2%. I’ll ask them the next time I see them, which could be a while because I hear they’re taking a break from touring to work on their new album.

Go buy some Electric Six. You won’t be sorry. Also, White Gold’s two current music videos can be seen below. Enjoy!

Written by joliesimons

April 24, 2008 at 9:23 pm

Axle Rose and Guns and Roses Claim We Will See Chinese Democracy

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Just in time for the 2008 Beijing Summer Games…

Turns out that Geffen Records and insiders are claiming that the legendary record by G&R, Chinese Democracy, will finally come out. Finally. We’ve been waiting 14 years.

Of course, this record is post-Slash. Rumors have been flying around for years as to when Guns and Roses are finally going to release this record. In what looks like a clever marketing scheme, we may even see the record in time for the summer games in Beijing. Ha ha, get it? Chinese Democracy?

Seriously, this could just be another rumor, so I’m not holding my breath.

Written by joliesimons

April 10, 2008 at 11:09 pm

Posted in Music

New Kids on the Block Get Hot Publicity Shot

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Everyone’s favorite celeb-mocking gossip blog, Perez Hilton, has posted this new photograph of the boys of New Kids on the Block. Apparently there’s enough reason for them to get back together in order to take this nifty publicity shot, looking hot in nice suits and sans mullets.

Perhaps NKOTB is getting back together?

I’ll probably be showing my age, but I was a huge, huge New Kids on the Block fan as a kid. I had a t-shirt and paperback book filled with black and white photos and band member profiles. Did you know that Danny really loves Oreos and that his bandmates called him “cookie monster?” I think that factoid was in there.

Anyway, I love kitsch from my childhood and would love to see an NKOTB reunion. Danny, Donny, Joe, John, and Jordan deserve another chance. Looks like Jordan isn’t even the hot one anymore.

Written by joliesimons

April 2, 2008 at 3:23 pm

Posted in Celebrity, Music

Ha Ha Tonka (the State Park) Vs. Ha Ha Tonka (the Band)

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Ha Ha Tonka State Park

I grew up in the Ozarks near one of the most beautiful state parks in the state and probably the midwest, Ha Ha Tonka state park. This little area is nestled up against a quiet arm of the Lake of the Ozarks and includes an island, a castle, a spring, cliffs, and karst everywhere.

Imagine my surprise, then, when I was reading Metacritic, a website that compiles media review information, and found out that Jim Caligiuri from the Austin Chronicle put the band Ha Ha Tonka on his top 10 albums of 2007 list. How many people would use a name like Ha Ha Tonka?

Turns out Ha Ha Tonka (the band) and I have more in common than I thought. I found out that they’re a band from Springfield, Missouri, the same place from whence I was just sprung after graduating from Missouri State. Famous Springfieldians include Brad Pitt and Bob Barker. Ha Ha Tonka (the band) used to have a stupid name, Amsterband, but wisely chose something appropriately more twangy and ready to rock.

After I found out that this band had indeed called themselves Ha Ha Tonka after the state park, I headed over to their MySpace page to check them out. Turns out they’re a bit Kings of Leon, and really work that whole Drive-By Truckers souther rock odyssey thing. Their first album is called “Buckle on the Bible Belt”–a title that very accurately describes Springfield, MO–and is filled with gospel harmonies and crunchy southern rock guitar.

Now here’s the real kicker: how is it I’ve never heard of Ha Ha Tonka (the band) before? Why did I have to hear about them now that I’ve left Springfield?

Oh, well. Visit Ha Ha Tonka (the band) on their website.

Written by joliesimons

March 14, 2008 at 1:09 pm

Posted in Music